Coming Soon: Matthew Van Horn--The MD Interview

I will be interviewing myself in a few days. Should be an interesting conversation, I can't wait to hear what I will say.

Mostly moved-in

We are now residents of Farmington Utah. Our home is taking shape and we love it. We had help from my brothers and our parents moving the large pieces of furniture. It is pretty quiet around our new neighborhood because there are many empty lots, but new homes are springing up like mushrooms. We can see the stars at night! There are horses down the street and today we walked to them and fed them apples. Our boys love the new home.

When we get everything moved in and out of boxes we would like to have friends visit.

Holy Crap I Am In Debt For A Quarter Million

Eh, it's not so bad. I, we, feel good about it. We don't have any other debt to worry about, except a small student loan. We bought some furniture last night at RC Willey to go in the new home, and today we did a walk-through inspection. We discovered that we have a crawl space under the house that has as much area as the floorplan. When the kids are bad we can just throw them in the dungeon until they gooden-up. Of course I'm kidding. But seriously, I wonder if I can put a drumset in that crawspace. It could be my man-cave. I can put up old Playboy calendars and day-glow rock posters. An extension cord running down through the trap-door will power the mini-fridge full of college drinks.

Looking forward to taking Spencer to school, playing in the snow in our yard, having a cat or two laying on the porch. Looking forward to seeing the sunset reflecting off the mountains a few miles to the East. Looking forward to climbing those mountains. I've already got a plan to traverse the ridge from Farmington canyon to the next canyon North.

Looking forward.

Three Dimensional Double Feature with My Boys

Saturday I took Spencer and Ash to see Toy Story 1 and 2. The animated films were re-released to theaters for two weeks, and they were presented in 3-D. I've seen both movies several times and will enjoy them for as long as I live. The two movies combined, plus previews and an intermission added to 3 hours of theater time for us. Was a little worried that Asher would become bored and walk away from his seat. He did well, but he got restless during the second movie and sat with me. We had a good time. I wish the original Star Wars would be re-released so I could take the boys. My dad took me and my brothers to see it when it was new in 1977 and I was six years old.

We are one month away from moving to our new house in Farmington. We've been going to furniture stores to look at bedroom sets and refrigerators. Some lucky store is going to get a lot of business from us.

American Dream

We spent about five weeks looking for a place to call home. We went out several times a week going from house to house and during that time I saw this one and toured it with our agent. Of course a brand new home appealed to me but it seemed a goal just out of reach. Then the $4,000 Utah grant money was announced and suddenly this home came into play. On the day we made the decision, we had also looked at another great home in West Valley City. It had 6 bedrooms and over 2,800 square feet, all finished. Everything about it was very nice--except we learned that the open field behind the house was slated to become the route for the Salt Lake County portion of Legacy Highway. It was a difficult decision, and we even went to the library to do research on Legacy plans. I finally asked Jana if she would be happy in the new home in Farmington. "Do you feel good about it?" She said yes, then we drove straight up there with the intent to sign a contract. Now, the home we were going to sign for is not the one we ended up with. It was a smaller 3 bedroom, but just as appealing, with a quarter-acre yard. While we were touring the home, we got a call from the builder's agent who told us that the sale of the 4 bedroom home down the street had just fallen through. We rushed over to the agent's office and promptly told her we wanted the newly available 4 bedroom. We found our home, the home my boys will grow up in, the the place we will finally let our roots grow and spread. Our American Dream.

We found a home

Details to come...

Still looking...

I don't know the exact count, but the number of homes we have looked at has to be at least 20 by now. The house-hunting has consumed a lot of our free-time (yet I managed to get in two shweeeeet hikes over the Labor Day weekend) and the emotions involved are tiring. We've seen new homes, old homes, and everything in-between. We've seen clean, well-cared for homes and grody cat-lady homes. Large ones, small ones. Short ones, tall ones. I'm starting to get all Seussy now. We have been concentrating in Woods Cross and Bountiful, so it's likely we will end up in South Davis. The Utah Gubmint has again announced free money giveaways to new home buyers--$4,000 bucks to us if we can find a suitable new home. I get a little annoyed that I can't seem to find more than a few newly-constructed homes within our price range, and the ones that are are going fast.

We are making an offer on one tomorrow. We'll see how it goes...

Looking for a home

It's our time.

We've been married ten years but have never had a place of our own. We are planning to be in a home by the end of November, therefore I've begun the process of scouring the Utah real estate listings for suitable homes to buy. We've considered living in Grantsville or Tooele, and last week we drove out there to get a feel for the area and the drive. It occurred to me that any home that far away from work and family would have to be special.

I've looked at homes in Woods Cross, Bountiful and Syracuse. We've also looked in Sandy, Holladay and Murray. I like the newer homes with stucco and rock exterior. I also like the older ramblers that have full, finished basements. The yard size is also a dream-maker or a deal-breaker. We've driven by some homes that have about 10 feet of grass for a yard and about 3 feet between the side of the house and the next-door neighbor's bathroom window. No thanks! I need a yard! My boys need a yard! Where am I going to park the boat and school bus if there's no front yard? (That's a joke.)

When we are moved in and stretching our legs in our slice of the American Dream, we will be calling YOU, our friends, over for good times with the Van Horns. For the men, there will be action movie nights and high-fives in the home theater I will set up. Surround sound volume turned up loudly--where it should be! For the women, there will be nights of Blongo or Bung-ho or Blago or whatever it's called; ladies gathering to win kitschy crap door decoration prizes simply from rolling dice. And the drinks will flow freely, (Non-alcoholic, of course.) served with grody broccoli and cauliflower casserole.

And we will have a cat. Maybe two.

How To Negotiate With Terrorists

From Hurricaneharry.blogspot.com


How To Negotiate With Terrorists


This brief blog entry takes you through a series of negotiations over time between peacemakers and terrorists:

A peacemaker walks up to the left side of a line. A terrorist walks up to the right side of the line. The peacemaker introduces himself. The terrorist kills him.

A peacemaker walks up to the left side of the line. A terrorist walks up to the right side of the line. The peacemaker asks, "why did you kill my friend?" The terrorist kills him and rapes his wife.

A peacemaker walks up to the left side of the line. A terrorist walks up to the right side of the line. The peacemaker says, "Stop that!" The terrorist kills him, rapes his daughter and kills his wife.

A peacemaker walks up to the left side of the line. A terrorist walks up to the right side of the line. The peacemaker says, "I'll pay you $1000 if you stop attacking us." The terrorist agrees to the deal, takes the $1000, and kills him.

A peacemaker walks up to the left side of the line. A terrorist walks up to the right side of the line. The peacemaker appeals to the United Nations. The United Nations says the peacemaker is at fault. The terrorist kills him.

A peacemaker walks up to the left side of the line. A terrorist walks up to the right side of the line. The peacemaker now has a gun, and threatens to use it. Other peacemakers start chanting the old 60's whine, "Can't we all just get along?" The peacemaker hesitates. The terrorist kills him.

A peacemaker walks up to the left side of the line. A terrorist walks up to the right side of the line. The peacemaker tries to convince his peacemaker friends that the terrorists aren't going to respond to negotiations, but they insist that if he kills the terrorist it'll just make the other terrorists mad. The peacemaker reluctantly agrees to try negotiating again. The terrorist kills him., his entire family, and his neighbor's family.

A heated debate now ensues between the peacemakers who want to be nice to the terrorists and the peacemakers who believe that there can never be peace until the terrorists are all dead. While they are debating, the terrorists kill 15 more peacemakers.

A peacemaker walks up to the left side of the line. A terrorist walks up to the right side of the line. The peacemaker asks himself, "Which is more important: being liked by everyone, or protecting my family?" The terrorist pulls a knife to kill the peacemaker, but the peacemaker pulls a gun and kills the terrorist first. The United Nations condemns the peacemaker's use of unproportional force. Many of his peacemaker friends turn against him.

A peacemaker walks up to the left side of the line. A terrorist walks up to the right side of the line. The peacemaker apologizes for what his friend did to the other terrorist. The terrorist kills him, his entire family and his neighbors, and threatens to destroy the city as soon as they develop a bigger weapon.

A peacemaker refuses to meet at the line because every time a peacemaker goes to the line the terrorist kills him. A terrorist walks up to the right side of the line and fires rockets into the peacemaker's town. The United Nations condemns the way the peacemaker provoked the terrorist by refusing to come to the line and meet with him.

Generations pass and not much changes until one day when the son of a peacemaker decides that the old strategy simply won't work. He walks up to the left side of the line a little early. As the terrorist approaches the right side of the line the peacemaker shoots him. Another terrorist approaches to replace the first, and the peacemaker shoots him too. This scene plays out several more times. Then a terrorist approaches carrying a white flag, but he also has weapons. The peacemaker shoots him. A terrorist next approaches with a ceasefire resolution from the U.N. The peacemaker shoots him also. A large group of terrorists approach and the peacemaker shoots them all and drops a nuclear bomb on the city they came from. The peacemaker continues killing the terrorists until the terrorists are all dead.

There is finally peace on earth and the United Nations takes the credit.

(No peacemakers or terrorists were harmed during the writing of this blog.)

What? Your favorite comedian didn't show you this?

Just doing what the State-Controlled Media will not do: Showing Barry in a bad light.

Ya gotta ask yourself, if this was George W. Bush, would you have seen it already?

Yes. Many times over. Letterman, Conan, SNL, et. al would have been riffing on this for days.

This clip would have been used to illustrate how much "The World" disrespects Bush and America.

In reality, it shows how a few (important) guys disrespect one man because he is perceived as a weak leader.

Lovin' all that Hope N' Change!

And again in Saudi Arabia. Watch as Barry holds out his hand several times and is ignored: